Jane Drysdale is a secretary by day, sex-toy saleswoman by night, and obsessed with old TV series reruns in her spare time. It's a routine, boring life. Then her car hits a shape-shifter elf disguised as a bunny, and before she knows it, she's transported to the magical world of Lowth and put on trial for vehicular Elficide.
It's not anything like what she's watched on Law and Order. Her legal council is half-fairy, half-elf Charlie Whelphite, who spends part of his time trying to decipher Jane-speak, and the rest of it mourning the loss of his nice, comfortable rut. Self-conscious of his wings in a wing-free society, he doesn't need them vibrating whenever she's near.
A dormant side of Jane emerges. She soon takes charge of her life, dragging Charlie along, as they begin an epic journey of danger, destiny and mutual attraction. Lowth, which has an agenda of its own, alternates between helping and hindering them on their trip through swamps, white-water rapids and encounters with a homicidal elf.
As Jane and Charlie confront their heritage and the difference between their worlds, the answer soon emerges to the question "What Do You Say to a Naked Elf?"